Sunday 8 August 2010

Ex-cruise-iatingly bad poker

I’m writing this blog entry from The Independence of The Seas , on a cruise in the Med. On the whole, I am a big fan of cruise vacations. It’s genuinely true that there is something for everyone on these big ships. This is our third cruise, and our second on this particular vessel. We have already booked for next year.

I’d describe Royal Caribbean as an upper mid-market brand. It’s a high quality offering, but it’s not at all formal or stuffy. Fantastic for kids (especially the older ones). We do not see our 14 and 15 year-olds except at dinner. It’s obviously a very safe environment, and they love the freedom. There is a 1am curfew, which they simply ignore.

The ship has a casino. A pretty big one, and quite busy. Like most American casinos it is rather over-populated with slot machines (this ship is now based entirely in Europe, so the slots are scarcely used).

It also has a whole range of blackjack and (double zero) roulette tables and other daft casino games, like 3-card poker. No craps though, interestingly. The table takes up too much room, possibly. It is a ship, after all. Space is at a premium (theoretically, anyway).

Thankfully (I thought) it does also offer some real poker.

They actually have 2 (count’em – two !) hold’em tables, although both are 7-seater converted blackjack tables. Obviously the considerable expense (many hundreds of dollars) of a real 9/10 seater couldn’t be accommodated after they spent $800Million on the ship itself. This is a shame, although last year I played some enjoyable poker on the same cruise (interpretation: I won).

However, it wasn’t the physical limitations which really irritated me this year.

The fact is, these guys really know how NOT to run a cardroom. Many of you reading this will play at The International which is of course a superb example of how to do things right.

Of course, you may have gripes about the tourney schedule, or the structures, or the buy-in ranges or you may not like the cash race, or the carpet or the temperamental air-con etc. But even if you are a big fan of the club, you probably don’t appreciate just how important the basics are – especially competent, efficient dealers and knowledgeable, consistent management.

When the basics are wrong, it makes for a bad game. The other thing is that the game was full of really bad players. Now, I generally don’t agree with those who say they hate playing bad players.

Of course I understand that it can be difficult to know where you stand against players who don’t know what their bets are supposed to mean, and I have some sympathy for the extra bad beats that come around because the fish do not realise when they are supposed to fold.

However, I usually say that I love to play against terrible players, for the obvious reasons. I’ve organised plenty of very enjoyable corporate tournaments at The Gutshot and The International, where the fields were pretty weak. I even have some decent success against those fields. I also certainly don’t mind playing cash against players who are even worse than me.

However, the cruise players were bad in especially annoying ways (which I shall come on to).

It’s actually quite surprising to me that the players could be so bad. The ship has 4,000 passengers. Altogether, perhaps 20 people or so came along to the poker games. Just 1 in 200.

So, you would imagine these were the ones who actually already play and know the game quite well. It would seem like they must have actively sought out the game (like I did). I don’t think live cash poker is the kind of thing people just “have a go” at.

Actually, the standard in all kinds of games on ship seems quite low. For example, I went along to some darts sessions hosted by Keith Deller (remember him ? Nice guy actually). Highest score with 9 darts – that sort of thing.

tbh, I didn’t trouble the scorers much. I haven’t played for many, many years (although the 1989 Oxford-Cambridge varsity match is still a very clear memory to me. Well, the actual memories are a bit fuzzy as they tend to be after 12 pints, but my memory of not remembering is quite clear).

Still, you would have thought with the number of tattooed arms on the ship, the treble-20 would be wearing out. However, the quality of the arrows was not impressive ! Maybe being at sea causes problems. No such excuses for the poker players.

Last year, the onboard poker game included a couple of genuine UK regulars and some others who had some decent gamble in them, and it proved a fun game.

This year, the players seemed to know the rules and mostly claimed to play a lot online, but they were just mind-numbingly bad.

Let me try to give you some idea just how bad.

The casino was running a 7-handed shootout satellite to win an EPT cruise. $50 entry, with $25 rebuys. The structure was alarmingly shallow. 1,000 chips with blinds 25/50 to start. 10 minute levels, blind doubling at each level. 30 minute rebuy period.

I can tell you for a fact that I was the best player by a mile. I know this because I had 5 rebuys in 30 minutes, which was 5 more than the rest of the table put together. You have to try to get some chips, I feel. I went on to finish (very annoyingly) 2nd in my heat (i.e first of the losers).

The lady who won my table made this play of champions:

After a 3-way all in at the 3-handed stage, she had scooped and I was left with just 1,200 chips at the 1,000/2,000 level. She had 20,800. I won the first heads-up hand [ all in perforce on the BB], so I had 2,400 on the button for the next deal.

Obviously I moved in blind (before the cards were dealt, so there was no iota of doubt that I was blind). She therefore had to put in 400 into a pot of 4,400 against a blind hand. She had me out-chipped by 10-1.

She folded! I don’t think she is necessarily going to be outclassed at the final table, mind you.

Still, she was a tournament player. Perhaps the cash players would be better. Well just barely, I suppose.

The terrible players were part of the problem with the cash game. The slow pace of the game was probably the most difficult thing to cope with.

But, in the meantime, the rake was a nightmare. Now you generally do not find me engaged in a Jack Glass-style rant about the niceties of reduced rake or missed blinds or the like.

I generally do not worry about the rake in any game. I’m usually just happy to play.

Still, 10% is a pretty steep rate in a 7-handed $1-2 game. It was at least capped (at $10). That is where the good news ended. They raked heads-up pots; they raked split pots; they raked pre-flop pots; they started the rake at $5 pots.

The final straw was when I raised the button and the blinds folded. They raked this pot as well.

There was a players’ revolt at this point. Apparently this was a new rule, and I don’t know what was more shocking – the fact they wanted to take a rake in this scenario, or the fact that they couldn’t immediately see it was wrong.

Eventually they relented on this ruling, although we had to put each new dealer straight on it. However, they still raked in the case of limp-raise-all fold.

Pretty tough to beat this rake, and somehow it felt even worse because at the end of each pot they would laboriously stack the pot into $10 piles and then count off the 10%. If you’re going to rob us blind, at least make sure we can’t see you doing it !

I still fancied I could beat the players and come out ahead. But to be honest I never found a good way to counter the extraordinarily passive play. The players would simply limp virtually all the time.

I obviously tried raising a lot. They would often call these raises, which sometimes made for decent post-flop pots, but it was impossible to bet them out of these pots. I suppose the best strategy would be tight-aggressive but the pace of play was glacial, so there simply wasn’t time to wait for good hands.

You would be amazed at the numbers of ways that inexpert dealer and bad players can slow the game down.

Obviously, start with slow shuffling and lots of forgotten blinds. Then, individually make change to everyone who has posted an oversized chip. Also pre-emptively make change for people who want to be able to have the right chips to call the $2 (i.e. everyone).

Since there isn’t a lot of folding, each street can take a while especially as players do not realise when it’s their turn. Naturally if there is an all-in it will take ages to get a count. Allow the $0.50 cent chips to play, of course, to complicate matters. Do various amounts of pointless stacking of the pot. At showdown, no one turns their cards over, and then it takes some time to decide who’s won.

I am exaggerating, certainly, and some of the dealers were accurate and would earn a shift or two at The International (if there were a London-wide pandemic flu, say). Some of the poor players were in fact just a bit weak-passive (almost experts, in context).

The fact is, it is just not fun playing in a game against all bad players where the rake makes it a basically just a zero-soon game.

I’ve already mentioned some of the outlandish rake rulings. To be fair to the casino, I think they ran a fairly efficient operation but just didn’t really understand poker and what makes for a good game.

They were earning a pretty good income despite all the problems (although you would think they would see it made sense to speed up the game). I think there could be a bit of a virtuous circle if they ran a better game with a slightly less extreme rake structure.

The final straw for me came when a player pocketed two-thirds of his stack after we combined two tables. That’s bad etiquette even if it weren’t against the rules. The floor didn’t prevent him from doing this, and for some reason I just couldn’t bear to continue in the game after this happened.

The best thing about this game, I suppose, is that it really makes me appreciate what I’m missing at the club. I can’t wait to get in a properly run game where I’m going to lose because the other players are just much better than me. DC-Wednesdays at The International sounds like a dream come true (£100 FO followed by a spot of 6-max multi-game madness).

Saturday 26 June 2010

Paradise City

Blog coming .... after I get some sleep.

Sunday 6 June 2010

How do they know ??

I created my Twitter account and within a couple of hours or so I picked up four "followers".

Each of these was basically a semi-spam account. Real businesses (as far as I know) all related to poker - with something to sell. This happens a little bit on facebook. In my case, for example, a cardroom or casino may invite me to be their friend. I usually decline such meta-advertising.

On LinkedIn, headhunters invite you to connect so they can get in touch with you and so that they can see into your network of colleagues.

Fair enough, I suppose, and I nearly always decline those invites as well.

On Twitter, I doubt one can block a follower - it's a "recipient led network".

There's no real harm in it either.

What what intrigues me is how - when my account was just tens of minutes old and I have made no posts at all - they knew I was a poker player ?

They'd be kind of scary at the table I guess - excellent reads.

Friday 4 June 2010

To Tweet or Not To Tweet ?

I am hardly a technophobe, but I don't find myself leaping at the new technologies or the new internet trends. I was a pretty slow adopter of eBay, for example, and highly skeptical of their business idea. Likewise, I did not see the big deal about yet another search engine (google).

It took a while before I decided to give facebook a try, and the same for LinkedIn.

I have quite consciously avoided taking on any more of these networking services - they just eat up time, I think.

This specifically applied to Twitter. I really struggled to see the point of it. 140 characters - why ?

However, I am on the point of caving in.

With a trip to Vegas just around the corner, it seems like it would be the ideal way of keeping friends (those also in Vegas, those about to come, those staying at home or already back) informed of my progress at the tournaments and indeed to share the news of others among the "community" (I do find that UK poker players in Vegas constitute a real community).

I may soon be learning Twitterese.

Thursday 29 April 2010

A-Z guide to winning a beginners tournament

Avoid Bluffing.
Cheap Draws.
Exploit (Fully) Good Hands.
Introduce Judgement/Knowledge/Learning
Manipulate Novice Opponents.
Position !
Quickly Recognise Situations To Unlock Value

Winner [X] (You !)

ZOMG .....

__________

It didn't work, however.

Monday 26 April 2010

Double Trouble

I turned up at The International last Tuesday night with one objective – to play SCRABBLE (and win). We’ve had some great matches at the club, in fact, with several tough poker players showing they are multi-talented.

I have a good record but lack of practice was a factor, and the field looked dangerous. Fair play to Sam Acheampong who was one of the first to put his name down (not his actual name – that doesn’t go in Scrabble) despite being a little outmatched.

Thing is, you never know with Sam. Maybe he could bink this thing as well (nb: BINK does go). I was a little wary when I drew him in the first round.

Sam, in fact, nearly didn’t play despite coming to the club specifically for the tournament.

Actually, when I arrived, I found him playing the £25 Deep’n’Steep. Apparently when he got through the door, he had forgotten why he’d come and clicked “auto-register”. Still, he assured me he’d probably still be available for the 7:30 Scrabble ;)

I resolved that there was no way I would attempt to play both, especially since I was planning to take down the Scrabble. However, I spotted Neil (definitely one of the favourites) at Table B.

This was enough of an excuse – and I was in. My seat was directly to the left of Sam !

There is a report on the Scrabble itself in the International Forum.

This blog is going to be about my attempt to do the Poker-Scrabble double on the same night.

I only had time to play half an orbit before I went off to organize the draw and then play my first round. This was enough time, though, for Sam to divest himself of his tournament duties (6-2 offsuit, how did he miss ??).

My table was broken whilst I got on with my match, and when I came back to play one hand 30mins later, I had to fold to a big 3-bet behind me from a solid player.

The table asks me what Acronym I’m playing today – I can’t think of one, so I say “SCRABBLE”.
One orbit later I came back and found my stack diminishing – down to 6k at 150/300. Playing only about 2 hands an hour, you don’t get too much choice in hand selection so this time I decide to over-limp in EP with 4-3o. The same player 3-bets again. I think “FIP” and call the extra 1,000. The dealer points out it’s actually another 400 on top of that. OK, I call.

Flop: 7-4-3. Check, ship, call. Kings no good sir !

30mins later I get to come back for another hand. I am on the Big Blind and with 7,800 at 800/1600 I figure it’s going in, but I find a fold to an UTG raise. I fold my SB as well.

Now I have only 5,400 and now I face a MP shove from an equally short-stacked player. I find A-5 and it has to be a call. The Big Blind thinks for a bit and decides he has to call.

J-4 for the initial raiser, A-5 here and 3-3 in the blinds.

That's not too bad ....

Flop 4-6-2.
Turn J.
River: 3 !

The BB takes a moment to realise I have scooped with a straight. Having trebled up, I get up to continue my Scrabble semi-final, but there are only 90 seconds til the break so I play one more – pocket Aces !

I end up all in pre vs 87s – I have to sweat an open ender on the turn but finish the level on 36k !

I see with amazement that there are only 19 players left – I’m thinking I may actually be final-tabling both comps.

Unfortunately, the “steep” part kicked in and having raise-folded one hand, I pushed with ATs (I only had 28k at 1,500/3,000 blinds), called by AQ. Queen high flop wasn’t great although the dealer gave it a go with a King on the turn. Somewhat surprisingly no Jack came and I fell in 15th.

Neil, meanwhile, did go on to make the final table and chop the comp. He would have had an excellent shot at the double but unfortunately he ran into Ade in the Semis and lost despite scoring not far short of 400 himself.

So, I have learnt the meaning of another word:

SCRABBLE, I now realise, stands for: Sometimes Call Recklessly And Bink (Be Lucky) – Easy !

Tuesday 20 April 2010

Poker as SPORT

When I walked into the club last Wednesday, a number of people came up to me to ask we whether I would be playing "No, No, No" again.

I was able to answer "No" (just the once). Tonight was "SPORT".

Almost universally, the other players immediately offered a possible meaning for today's acronym (at least for the "S" - some of them petered out after that).

Kirit came up with the quickest and most complete alternative version: "Shove, Push, Overbet, Re-shove and Tilt"

I decided to keep the real meanings to myself for the time being (mainly because I didn't want to stifle the creative guessing ... )

S for Spew ? S for Solid ? S for Stud ? S for Stacks ?

I can now reveal that this is what I had in mind:

S for Situations / Situational. I do believe that optimum poker is about identifying, understanding and exploiting the situations that arise. A situation can be as simple as "I have 8BB on the button; it's folded to me; I have two cards; I'm all-in !".

Most are a little more complex, and there can be dozens of factors to consider. However, by paying attention to the key variables - stacks, position, betting patterns and so on - we can make more good decisions.

In today's case, I intended "S" to focus me on actively seeking out good situations that didn't rely excessively on hitting good cards.

P for Position. Many of my acronyms will contain "P" since position is so crucial. I like to think it has the special property that no matter how much importance you have given to it, it's always a little bit more important than that.

Position is of course vital in creating and maximising many Situations.

O for Opponents. Playing at The International, one is generally facing a strong field. I do believe that the standard of play is high. I have certainly found that a standard £100 MTT here attracts a tougher field than a GUKPT ot a WSOP event.

The other thing is that I will know a lot of the players. In any case, I was conscious that I wanted to actively bring my knowledge and history with players into my thinking.

Studying the Opponents and their Position is of course useful in identifying good Situations.

R for Reads. When I first started playing, I believed it was a waste of time looking for reads. I thought betting patterns and other objective information were much more important.

Part of the reason I did not pay much attention to reads was that I knew I was too inexperienced to process all the basic info, let alone get into the ephemera.

Now, however, I come to realise that once you and your opponents reach a certain level then the relative importance of live reads grows considerably. I am a long way from being able to do this competently, but it's important to practice.

My plan was to explicitly look for and make reads and then compare my reads with the reality. I resolved to try to make reads in hands that I was not involved with as well, to gain extra practice "for free".

Naturally, Reads combined with information on the Opponents and the power of Position can put us in a good Situation

T for Timing. The "Timing" here refers to a number of tournament concepts - thinking about the stage of the event, deciding when to change gears, evaluating good opportunities to make a squeeze or a steal etc. It's also a reference to taking my time in making important decisions.

Well-judged Timing, strong Reads on the Opponent and good Position can make for a great Situation.


Just after the break, I thought I found a good Situation: I had Position on my my Opponent, Robin Dhinsa. I felt I had a good Read that his raise was weak (he himself was in hijack seat where he would be raising a lot) and that he could fold a lot of hands to a shove.

Timing looked good - I had 20 Big blinds and for Robin to call would be over 1/3 of his stack.

I re-raised all-in with 7h4h.

Robin dwelled. It seemed I had made the right move.

However, Robin obviously believes fishing is a sport as well and made the call with KhQh (only kidding Robin).

Unbelievably, I missed. Next time, I am playing "WHOOPS".

Friday 16 April 2010

No, No, No !

I do like to come into a tournament armed with a good acronym.

Recent examples include:

"TV poker" = play Tight, and Value bet - I used that one for the HORSE tournament at the LPM festival.

"TOP" (or "POT") = Tight Or Positional; this was supposed to be for cash games to remind me to think about hand selection relative to my position in the deal. Admittedly, I didn't really use that one. I just said "POT" a lot.

In my most recent outing to the £100 Wednesday Freezeout at The International, I came with "No, No, No" which stood for:

1. No Show: I tend to have a bit of an addiction to showing my hand (i.e. generally showing bluffs - I get many opportunities to do this; occasionally to show my hero folds). I think it is pretty clear that a good rule is never to show and so the first "No" was to remind me of this, and I stuck with it almost 100%

2. No Hurry: Many times in the past (often in big tournaments) I have regretted not taking a little longer to make a really big decision. I tend to act very quickly.

Online I will often finish an MTT without having used a single second of my timebank. Live, I have only been "clocked" twice ever - each time it was an all-in call in a bracelet event. So, I am not exactly pushing the boundaries of an acceptable pace of play.

I should take a little time when the big hands play out, and I did also consciously slow down my routine decisions a little so that I could start to get into a habit of thinking a bit more about my actions.

3. No Fear: a reminder to myself that if the conditions seem right then I must be prepared to put my tournament life in jeopardy - whether it be the important thin value bets, the all-in calls, the strong reads, the short-stack shove with air or the trademark H-bomb check-raise bluff.

As a rule, I am not exactly nitty but I do sometimes hesitate when it comes to being actually all-in, and even I do need to remind myself that it's important to be committed to the moves we have decided upon.

I think, as well, that it's important to try to project no doubts that our opponents may pick up on.


With this mantra in mind, I set out once again on my mission to finally win something at the club. I resolved to play a genuinely solid game and - to many people's surprise - I actually did tighten up a lot on the day.

Admittedly, first hand I opened UTG with 8s7s . I was paid off 3 streets of value as the board came K-7-2-7-5 . My opponent was a bit upset at himself.

I played relatively few hands (for me, at least) and I also found the fold button in many spots where I wouldn't normally. I raise-folded 77 - TT about half a dozen times at least to strong action. Normally I think "they must have AK - let's race !"

I had a lucky break when I raised AcKh from UTG+1, with a MP caller and Terry "Final Table" Simpson calling in the BB.

I decided to check the JcTc9d flop - checked around.

On the turn, good news/bad news: the Qc.

Terry led out just 500 into a pot of nearly 2,000. I was not quite sure what to make of it. I felt I had to raise for value and made it 2,300. MP folded and Terry insta-shoved about 6k more. I have to call, I think. He showed 6c2c . Luckily a club hit the river and I was sitting on a nice stack.

I was pleased at my play in one other pot that I remember. Having raised early with 7h4h and received a call from a loose player in the blinds, I checked the 5c3c2h flop and called when the BB bet the Ac turn.

The river was an offsuit King and I found raise on the river - called by Ace-Ten.

In this hand, I was pretty sure he did not have a flush but in the past I have generally worried that if I raise I may get bluff-shoved and have to make a hero fold.

In this case, I had decided I was calling a shove, but as it was I probably got full value anyway.

Talking of river shoves, there was a funny hand against Chen when I had KhTh.

On the flop (Q9x), I pick up a gutshot and a backdoor flush draw and call Chen's lead bet.

On the turn (Jack), I make the nut straight but somehow I don't realise, and I check behind even though there is now a flush draw on board.

The river pairs the nine and puts a flush there. I am thinking to myself that I may hero-call Chen with King-high if he bets (say) 3/4 of the pot.

However, he over-bet shoves more than twice the pot! I ponder whether I can hero-call now and then after a little while I check my cards as I go to fold, and see I have the straight!

Now, against Chen, I snap call and am good against his A-9.

I began to feel that I had a good chance at my first win but at the 2-table stage, it all unravels after we move up to the TV table.

Phil King opens in UTG+1. I have him well covered and raise with AK. Now the BB wants to shove,

Phil folds (TT apparently), and I have to call 13k into 22k leaving myself with 7k if I lose (about 9bb at that stage).

I can hardly fold (or can I ? If I fold, I have 25bb).

The BB has QQ and holds.

Soon after I shove KsQs and am called by A-8o in MP (a bit surprising !).

The first two cards out are Ts, 9s so I have 18 outs 3 times.....

3d ... No,
7d ... No,
4h ... No !

Need a new mantra for next time ...

Tuesday 13 April 2010

A - Z of Poker (abridged)

Avoid being cold-decked; even fold good hands (if justified).

Karma? Luck? Meaningless ... nothing outweighs profits / quality results.

Simple truth: unite volume with experience & you'll zoom !

Sunday 11 April 2010

Post Mortem

It's rather incredible that 3 months have elapsed since I last posted. I doubt I have any readers left ! Previous analysis has shown me that hits are closely correlated with posts.

It's not entirely due to a lack of blogworthy activity, although it is true that being back at work has slowed me down in terms of playing and then in terms of finding time to write about it.

Several times, in fact, I have made notes at the table with the intention of committing my thoughts to the blogosphere, but then time has passed by and the events no longer seem sufficiently topical.

This post will have to serve as a placeholder for posts that will follow shortly.

Saturday 16 January 2010

WBCOOP

Online Poker

I have registered to play in the PokerStars World Blogger Championship of Online Poker! The WBCOOP is a free online Poker tournament open to all Bloggers, so register on WBCOOP to play.

Registration code: 644544